Luxure - The Cardinal Brotherhood Book One Page 4

  “No. Lucky for you. I’ve been listening to everything and everyone who passes through here, and it looks like you got away with it… this time. You can’t be so careless in the future, Lux. You know better. If Luc found out you’re still alive, he wouldn’t stop searching until he found you.” I watch fear cross her perfectly-formed features and instantly feel guilty. My actions have put her in danger.

  “And if he found out you helped me…”

  “He’d kill me. I’ve always known the risks so don’t go feeling bad about it now. Although, I find your sudden concern for my welfare after almost a thousand years of risking my life on a daily basis quite amusing.”

  “I’m an asshole.”

  “Of course you are. You’re a deadly sin for crying out loud. If I wanted a saint for a best friend, I would have chosen a little differently! For better or worse, you’re stuck with me, so get over it and be more careful next time you decide to go on a bender.”

  I stand for a moment taking in the woman before me. She is so kind, and generous, and beautiful, and I don’t deserve her, but she’s been by my side for almost a millennium, and I need to protect her. I can’t tell her what’s going on. I need to figure this out on my own.

  “I’m sorry. You know me. Couldn’t pass up on some good old-fashioned corruption!” She just rolls her eyes and turns to walk away. “So what have I missed?”

  “Don’t go changing the subject. What was it you came rushing in here wanting to talk about?”

  “Nothing important.”

  “Sure sounded important when you were shouting and cursing in my head.”

  “Just drop it, Selma. I’ve put you in enough danger by being an asshole the past few days. Let’s just leave it at that.”

  “That doesn’t make me feel better in the slightest. In fact, you’ve just confirmed that you’re hiding something.”

  “Drop it! I’m going to go clean up and change my clothes. I’ll see you later.”

  I can see the hurt in her eyes, but I storm off knowing it’s best if I don’t involve her in whatever the hell it is that is going on right now.

  “Lux! Luxure… wait!” I keep going heading to my hideout. my cave, my home.

  It’s not until I’m safe in my own space that I finally let my guard down, and the gravity of what could have happened sinks in. I could have been discovered. I could have put Selma in grave danger, and what do I have to show for it? I’ve been watching the professor twenty-four hours a day trying to figure out who or what she is, but I’m no closer to the truth.

  When she was taken to the hospital, I morphed into a paramedic and wandered the halls unnoticed to find out if she was okay. Something inside of me has felt off since the moment she touched me. An unease that I’ve never felt before. It only got worse after they took her away, and every time I look at her from a distance, it grows. She hasn’t had any more seizures, and after a night of observation, the doctors discharged her and told her to take it easy for a few days. From what I’ve seen, her eyes are back to normal, and they haven’t changed again since she was lying in my arms on the floor of the gallery.

  I’ve never seen anything like that happen to a human being before. I’ve never witnessed that kind of reaction in any being, supernatural or otherwise. It was as if I were causing it, but that can’t be the case. I’m powerful, but I can’t make physical changes to humans. I’m almost certain I was the only one who could see the change. I subtly questioned some of the people who were there that night, and not one of them mentioned anything about her eyes.

  I spent the following days learning everything I could about her—her routine, who she hangs out with, what she’s interested in. Apparently, what you see is what you get. There are no skeletons in the closet, not that I could find anyway. She’s just a normal woman, successful, beautiful… with red glowing eyes that only I can see. I need to know what happened, what caused it, and why? I have an overwhelming desire to be around her, near her… to know her.

  I haven’t been able to concentrate on anything since I held her in my arms that night. The passage of time became irrelevant in her presence. How could I be so careless? Only now in the stillness and tranquility of Uitare, do I realize how much the past five days have taken out of me. Something about her drains me, but as I lay my head down to rest, I’m haunted by images of a red-haired vixen—a beauty beyond anything I’ve ever seen before. It’s not until I decide that tomorrow will be the day I confront her, that I feel a sense of calm wash over me, and I manage to recharge.

  I am up and ready to go with the rising suns of Uitare. In the Millennium years that I have called this plane home, it never gets old watching the nine suns of this land rise over the horizon and high into the sky above. It is a thing of true beauty. It’s such a stark juxtaposition for this place—the space between—the plane between Earth and the Underworld. It seems wrong that such beauty is wasted here, but then I look at Selma, and I realize why. There are many things of beauty in this plane. The Masuulka are neither bad nor good. They are impartial, condemned to police the gateway between worlds for all eternity. They are a peaceful race by nature, and they deserve to exist in a place of vast magnificence. Selma deserves the best of everything. Why she was chosen to be one of the Masuulka rather than an angel is beyond my comprehension. I cannot imagine another being with such compassion, love, and selflessness.

  I’m interrupted by a tap on my shoulder and a voice invading my thoughts. “Hey, Lux. You in a better mood today?”

  “Yeah. Sorry about last night. I was… confused. I know what I need to do now. I have to go. Catch up with you later?”

  “Where are you going?”

  “Back to San Francisco.”

  “Please don’t stay the night.”

  “I won’t… I promise.” I pull her into my arms holding her tight as she breathes in my scent. I hate that I can’t switch off the effect I have on her. I hate that I can’t be who she wants me to be. She wants a mate, and I can’t be that person. The day Abiteth died, my heart died with her, and I respect Selma too much to use her for sex. It would never be just sex for her.

  When I pull away, I can see the fear in her eyes. “Stay here, Luxure. Stay with me.”

  “I can’t.”

  “What’s so important that you would risk exposure like this?”

  “I’ll explain everything… when I know what I’m dealing with. I’ll be back tonight.” I kiss her forehead, my mind instantly comparing her skin to the touch of Professor Sovende. Cold granite as opposed to soft, warm velvet. I crave that warmth.

  “Love you, Sel.”

  As I transition back to Earth, I can hear her whispered words in my mind. “I love you, too, Luxure. More than you’ll ever know.” It’s like a knife through my chest. I hate that I cause my best friend in the universe—my only friend—so much pain.

  As soon as the familiar scents of San Francisco fill my nostrils, my thoughts turn to the task at hand, everything else becoming insignificant. I know where she’s going to be today, and I’m going to talk to her. I’m going to find out who or what she is.

  The University campus is abuzz today. It’s Thanksgiving weekend, and everyone is heading home to their families. Classrooms are empty, and hallways are full of students in a hurry to catch their flights, trains, or say goodbye to their friends before setting out on their road trip home. Excitement is in the air, and I enjoy the crackle of energy surrounding humans during the holidays. They have a physical reaction at times like this—a renewed sense of hope, a deeper understanding of what family means. It’s in these moments that I envy them. I miss my brothers. I miss having that familial connection knowing there were people out there that had my back no matter what.

  As I make my way toward her office, I can sense her—her scent, her energy, her heartbeat. I can feel it all from two hundred yards away. I don’t know how I’m doing this. The only people I’ve ever been able to sense in this way are supernatural beings, and only when I was trying to sense
them. I’ve never had it happen without willing it.

  The door opens, and through the crowd, I hear her gasp. “It’s you.” Her voice is barely a whisper and yet clear as a bell to me.

  “It’s me.” I disguised myself as the same guy from the gallery signing. It’s the only way to justify seeing her again. Just a concerned acquaintance.

  Each step toward her feels as if I’m being reeled in. Our eyes locked on one another, a physical tether pulling us closer together. She remains fixed to the spot, her hand gripping the door handle so tightly I can see her knuckles turning white. I can hear her heart beating wildly in her chest, and I delight in the effect I have on her. Although, I’m a little disgruntled that this façade is affecting her rather than my true form.

  She clings to the door holding it open in silent invitation. As soon as I’m inside, I hear the door slam and lock. The room becomes a vacuum. All other sound ceases to exist. There is only the thundering of her heart and her ragged breaths. I can’t explain the urgency I feel to be close to her. I pace the room trying to decide the best way to address the endless number of questions that have been spinning in my head for the past week.

  “Who are you?” Her voice is like a beacon drawing me in.

  I stride across the room to where she remains frozen with her back against the door. I daren’t touch her. The last time I did, she passed out in my arms. I brace my hands on either side of her shoulders, my lips mere inches from hers. I want so badly to kiss her, but in a show of true restraint on my part, I force myself to refrain. “I’m the guy whose lap you had your head in last week.” It diffuses the tension between us ever so slightly, and I enjoy the smirk that creeps across her features.

  “I’m sorry about that.”

  “Don’t be. It wasn’t how I pictured that scenario when I first saw you, but your head in my lap in any capacity is pretty amazing.” Her laugh is magical—a sweet melody that makes her even more endearing.

  Her eyes never leave mine. “Why are you here?”

  “I wanted to see you and check that you’re okay after last week. I’m chivalrous like that.”

  “What’s your name? It’s a bit of a mouthful to refer to you as ‘my chivalrous savior,’ don’t you think?”

  “You don’t remember? My name is Lux.”

  “Lux.” Hearing my name on her lips again is delicious. “And do you have a last name… Lux?”

  “Zonder. Lux Zonder.”

  “Well… Lux Zonder.” How does she make something so simple sound so fucking hot? “It’s finally nice to put a name to the face.”

  “Yes. We were just getting to the introductions last week when you went to great lengths to avoid my company.”

  “I assure you, it would have been my pleasure to spend the evening with you last week instead of embarrassing myself like that.”

  “You have nothing to be embarrassed about. You were unwell. It happens. You were still the most stunning woman there… even if you were convulsing on the floor.” The blush on her cheeks is adorable.

  “Sirena Sovende.” It hits me square in the chest when I hear her name in full on her lips. My body has a physical reaction as if it speaks to something inside of me that I don’t understand.

  “Sirena Sovende? Beautiful.” The minute the words leave my lips, I watch in awe and confusion as a red ring appears around her eyes and disappears just as fast.

  “What’s wrong?”

  I lean in closer, my lips just millimeters from hers. “What. Are. You?”

  “I’m… just a professor.”

  “You’re not just… anything.” I run my fingers gently down the side of her neck, her skin warm and soft to the touch. She lets out the sexiest little moan, and my fingers begin to burn. Not a nice hot buzzing feeling. Actual. Burning. Agony. I immediately pull away. “What the fuck was that?”

  “What?” She walks toward me confusion evident in her expression. She didn’t feel that?

  “There’s nothing normal or ordinary about you, and you’re not just a professor.”

  “What does that mean? Is it supposed to be a compliment or an insult?” As she stalks toward me, I can’t help myself. Even if my body bursts into flames, I want her touch.

  “Definitely a compliment.”

  “Why did you pull away just now?”

  “You didn’t feel it?”

  “Yes, I felt it, but I didn’t want it to stop.” We obviously experienced two different sensations. Her honesty is disarming.

  “Trust me. If I could go back in time thirty seconds, I wouldn’t have let you go.” I look at her—really look at her. She’s one hundred percent human. I can hear her heartbeat. She radiates the warmth that the blood pumping through her veins creates. “There’s something about you, Sirena. Something I can’t fathom.” I have no idea what’s going on. Maybe it’s me? I’m having some effect on this innocent woman. She’s most certainly affecting me—physically and mentally.

  “I’d like to thank you for what you did last week. If it weren’t for you, I would probably have cracked my head open on the floor of the gallery… or worse. Do you have plans for dinner tomorrow? I know it’s Thanksgiving, and everyone has plans, but maybe…”

  “I’m free.”

  A delighted surprise lights up her smile. “Perfect!” She turns to her desk and scribbles something down on a piece of paper. “Here’s my address. Come over around 4:00 p.m.?”

  She tucks the folded paper into the front pocket of my pants sending another bolt of lightning coursing through my body. I struggle to maintain my composure. I already know where she lives. I’ve been watching over her for a week, and I still don’t know why. “I’ll be there, but I better be going for now.”

  As I turn to leave, her parting words chill me to the core. “Oh. I can’t believe I forgot. Thank you for checking in on me at the hospital. I had no idea you were a paramedic. How lucky was I to have passed out in the arms of a trained professional?”

  What the fuck?

  I whip my head around. “What are you talking about?”

  “I saw you at the hospital. You were in the hallway talking to my nurse. You were wearing a paramedic’s uniform. It was nice of you to check on me.” I’m frozen to the spot. She saw me? Me? I was a different person when I went to the hospital. I didn’t want to risk her seeing me—the guy she saw at the gallery. “And I’m so glad you came by today. I’m looking forward to dinner tomorrow. I wanted a chance to thank you, and now I have it.”

  “You saw me at the hospital?” My voice is unrecognizable even to me.

  “Yes. You’re somewhat hard to forget. You were at my lecture the day of the signing, too.” Fuck, fuck, fuck. I obviously wasn’t paying attention to my disguise if she saw the same man on every occasion. How is that possible? I’m always so careful about the way humans perceive me. “Come to think of it, have I just handed my address to a stalker?” She laughs. Carefree and trusting of a complete stranger—of me.

  “What do you think?”

  Her demeanor sobers. “I think that for some reason I can’t explain, I trust you. I feel like I know you, that we’re connected somehow. So… no… I don’t think you’re a stalker.” She walks toward me, slowly, a true huntress. She raises herself up onto her tiptoes and places a kiss on my cheek. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

  Everything inside of me is at war. I have more questions than I came in here with. Every fiber of my being wants to be near her, to understand her, to know more about this extraordinary woman. There’s so much I want to say, and yet all that comes out is, “Yes.”

  A glutton for punishment, I risk running my hand down her cheek for a second time. The searing pain is gone, but a shimmer lights up her skin under my touch. It’s like pearls— glistening—stunning in its beauty. She leans in, unaware of what’s happening to her. What the fuck am I doing to this woman?

  Without another word, I head for the door. One last glance, and her skin is as pale and flawless as it was when I arrived. I need to get
out of here. I can’t think straight when I’m around her. I need to go to the one place in this city where I can truly be alone with my thoughts.

  4

  LUXURE

  The city looks amazing from this vantage point. Ever since they built the Golden Gate Bridge, it’s been my favorite place to be alone. Tonight is perfect. A mist has settled over the water, and only the tallest buildings are visible from my vantage point on the highest part of the bridge. It’s so vast that no one would ever be able to see me at this height, and I can just… be. It’s the one place on Earth that makes me feel at ease. It’s peaceful.

  I don’t even know where to begin processing what happened today with Sirena. I don’t understand why I’m having such unusual effects on her. My touch and my voice seem to cause physical reactions, and none of them are good. I’m used to human women being affected by me—they moan, they squirm, they come hard and loud, but this? None of this is familiar territory. From the moment I laid eyes on Sirena Sovende, my life has been in disarray. I didn’t even follow up on that college couple I tracked to her lecture hall that first day. I never walk away from a target. I’ve stalked this Earth for thousands of years, and I never once deviated from my plans… until I saw her. Everything about her calls to me on a molecular level. My body reacts to her in ways I’ve never experienced before—not even with Abiteth. I affect her in ways I haven’t seen in any being—human or supernatural.

  I know I should walk away now because whatever I am doing could hurt or even kill Sirena. I’m starting to believe her seizure happened because of me, and that one incident could have been fatal. I wouldn’t normally care about the collateral damage in my games, but with her, it’s different. I feel a primal desire to protect her—from me—from what I could do to her and the reactions I don’t understand between us. I know she feels a strong, inexplicable connection to me, but the severity of what’s happening is lost on her, and if I try to explain what I am and how I’m affecting her, she would never believe me. And yet… I already know I’m going to go to her house tomorrow and have dinner with her. I’m going to try to find out more about her, and I’m going to try to figure out what the fuck is happening when we’re around each other. I can’t help myself. I want to be near her, and if there’s one thing I’m sure of—I’m a selfish bastard, and I always do what I want and what suits me… no matter the cost.