Mustang Daddy - A Single Daddy, Small Town Second Chance Romance Page 5

  “Will do, Doc.”

  I close the door behind him and rest against it, sinking to the floor. I knew it was going to be hard moving back here, but I never could have anticipated what it would feel like to see the evidence that Maddox truly got over what we had. He has a daughter. A sweet little girl who idolizes him, and who he is clearly besotted with. I always knew he would make a wonderful father – I just always thought I would be the one to give him children.

  I realize in this moment, a small part of me, one I’d buried deep, still hoped we’d find each other again one day. That the love we shared was timeless. I know now, that I never really got over Maddox Hale. And my penance for breaking his heart will be to witness the life and family he built in my absence. Jax is right – I made that choice for Mad the day I left. I only have myself to blame.

  In fourteen years, no one has even come close to what I felt for Maddox Hale – what I feel. I lived with a college boyfriend for a few years, but in the end, he wanted more than I could offer. I don’t blame him for leaving – it takes a special person to support a doctor in training. Time is limited, and a social life is non-existent. He deserved to be my top priority, but I was married to my residency. That’s what I told myself. I didn’t want to face the facts – no man would ever hold my heart the way Maddox did. I compared every man I ever dated to him, and not one of them measured up.

  Once you’ve felt what it is to be truly loved for who you are – a pale imitation will never be enough. I can fix broken bones, I can transplant a human heart – I’ve saved countless lives in my career, and yet, I can’t repair the damage I’ve done to my own heart. Maddox Hale has left a scar on my soul, and I will regret breaking his heart, until the day I die.

  I traipse through the remainder of my day, immersing myself in the little things; over-treating every patient in an effort to atone for my somber demeanor. The most exciting ailment to enter my office, was a case of poison ivy. Maybe I made a mistake coming back here, but after what happened in New York, I couldn’t stay.

  Chapter Five

  MADDOX

  The appointment reminder pinned beneath Rae’s favorite watermelon fridge magnet, silently taunts me as I reach for the milk carton. It’s been a week since she fractured her arm. I think Jax and I have been worse off than her. After the first few days of discomfort, she was back to her usual self, laughing and joking – asking everyone she sees to sign her cast. Jax has been over every day, trying to assuage his guilt; not that I blame him. Accidents happen, and Rae is faster than a whippet. She’s family to Jax, and no matter what I say, I know he’s going to be beating himself up about this until it’s a distant memory to Rae.

  A tiny whirlwind of enthusiasm – she comes barreling into the kitchen. “Mornin’, Daddy! Today is picture day. Am I pwetty?” She jumps into my arms, rubbing my scruff with her little hands.

  “Well, hello, Sunshine! Did Pops let you dress yourself?” I give him a knowing glance.

  “Yes, sir.” She’s wearing pink jeans, with a red tutu over the top, and an orange T-shirt. I don’t have the heart to make her change, so I guess this is how we’re going to the doctor’s office.

  I tried to make an appointment with the doc in the next town over, but Jax convinced me that I need to get used to seeing Annabeth, and find a way to be civil. He’s right, I know he is… I can’t be travelling 20 miles in an emergency, just to avoid her. I’m a grown man for God’s sake and I would never put my needs before Rae’s. I might be stubborn as a mule at times, but when it comes to my baby girl, there’s nothing I won’t do for her. So, I’m sucking it up and taking her to see Annabeth.

  “Get your shoes. We gotta leave in five minutes.” She scurries off, kissing my dad on the cheek as she goes. He looks a little off color this morning.

  “You okay, old man?”

  “Who you callin’ old? You’re the one that looks fit to puke – why you still letting that girl get to you after all these years?”

  “I’m not.” I know I sound like a petulant child, but he can’t let anything lie. “It’s just a pain in the ass having to go into town, wait at least an hour for Rae to get her new cast, putting me behind with what I gotta get done today. Need to re-shoe all the horses.”

  “Tell yourself whatever you need to, son.”

  His snide tone riles me, like a fox in the chicken coup. “Just because you’re bitter and alone, doesn’t mean I’m going to be. I’ve moved on – from Samantha, and Annabeth. I’m choosing to focus on my kid right now. Something you would never understand.” I leave him with that and go in search of Rae.

  The waiting room is small and inviting, with toys to keep the kids amused, and magazines for the adults to blankly stare at. I stick to the social norm and grab a copy of Time, but old Mrs. Grayson ignores my blatant signal. “She’s such a cutie pie. Looks like her momma.” I nod with a tight smile – the recognition of Sam, an unwelcome surprise. “Does Sally Rae visit with her often?”

  “You already know the answer to that, Mrs. Grayson.”

  “That girl needs a momma in her life.”

  Her comment irritates me. Usually I would let it roll off me, but not today. “We’re doing just fine.” My words are clipped, unable to contain my distaste. “Rae is perfectly happy.”

  “Maybe, now that A.B. is back?” She lets her assumption linger in the air.

  My rage twists and curls around it like a snake being charmed. “Now why would I want to find a replacement for Sam? Especially not a person who has demonstrated that they can’t be trusted to stick around! There are no second chances!”

  Her face pales as a small voice echoes through the waiting room. “Come on back, Rae. Let’s take a look at that arm of yours.” My eyes are drawn to the sight of her; eyes to the floor; her demeanor apprehensive. I don’t know how much she heard, but she knows I was talking about her – it’s written in the way she moves.

  This is going to be about as comfortable as a rectal exam.

  Rae’s hand slips into mine, clutching tight as we follow behind A.B. I can’t help but notice the sway of her hips as she walks. “Daddy, don’t squeeze my hand.” I didn’t even realize my grip had tightened, my other hand balled into a fist, fighting for control over my own reactions.

  “Sorry, Sunshine.” I swoop her up and carry her the rest of the way, distracting myself with silly jokes to make her laugh. She’s a little teary as A.B. removes the cast, ready for x-ray. A.B. and I haven’t said two words to each other. I haven’t even made eye contact. Everything is about my baby girl, and I don’t need to explain what she heard in the waiting room.

  “Can I see the picture, docor?”

  “Sure!” She presses a button, lighting a board on the far wall of her office. Securing the film in place, she beckons for Rae. “Come on over and I’ll show you.” I watch as my daughter bounds into her arms, careless of her injury. She cries out in pain, my natural instinct is to pull her to me, but I’m stopped in my tracks, dumbfounded as I watch… in terror. “Oh, sweetheart, are you okay? We’ve got to be careful with your arm until I get your new cast on.” A.B. rocks my daughter in her arms, brushing her hair from her face, before placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. “What color do you want today, Miss Hale?”

  Through broken sobs, Rae replies. “Rain…bow.”

  I hold my arms out to her. “Come to daddy, Sunshine.”

  She curls in close to A.B. “I wike docor cuddles. She smells wike flowers.”

  I stumble back into my chair, overwhelmed by memories of her scent… the way she tasted when I…

  “Daddy, Daddy! Look! That’s me.” She points to the x-ray, a clear fracture marring her little bone.

  “That’s the prettiest x-ray I’ve ever seen.”

  A.B. smiles, telling Rae what all the different bones are called, and showing her why it needs to heal. It breaks my heart to watch the two of them interact with such ease. I always imagined that her and I would settle down and have a family together. That she would cra
dle our child in her arms. There’s a lump building in my throat, blocking the air to my lungs. I hate that I still look back with fondness, and regret that I didn’t go after her when she left. I knew where she was. I could’ve followed her and maybe stood a chance at the life I always wanted. But, she made up her mind, and I wasn’t going to beg. “Rae, come to Daddy. Doc has to go and get the colors for your cast. We got business to attend to on the ranch. This ain’t a social call.”

  She wriggles and squirms, anxious to stay with her newfound friend. “Go to Daddy, Rae. I better go find some rainbow colors. Pink, blue, purple, green, red, and yellow – will that make for a good rainbow?”

  “Yes!” She lurches into my arms, pulling A.B. with her, forgetting to untangle her legs. “You got new colors!”

  “I ordered every color I could last week… so that you could choose.” She looks up into my eyes as she ensures Rae is safe in my grip. The soft scent of her perfume surrounds me, intoxicating me like a drug. Seconds feel like hours – my eyes fixed on her lips; slightly parted… inviting.

  “Daddy, you’re crushing me.” Rae is sandwiched between us, her tiny fingers tracing the line of my jaw.

  I take a few steps back, my brow furrowing in anger. Not directed at Rae, or Annabeth, but at myself. “Sorry, Sunshine. I forgot myself for a minute.” I look to Annabeth. “How stupid of me.” There’s just enough bite in my voice to send her rushing for the door.

  Rae scrambles out of my arms, down onto the exam table. “You okay to sit here like a big girl? Daddy will sit over there so as not to get in the doctor’s way?”

  “Okay. Don’t want you dis… distacking her from my rainbow!”

  As I slump into the chair, I breathe a sigh of relief. I don’t think I could stand being so close to A.B. again while she wraps Rae’s arm. Resting my elbows on my knees, I grasp my head in my hands, taking a moment to regroup. The door handle clicks, and my stomach begins to churn. I fucking hate this.

  “Let’s get you sorted, little lady. Then you can go see those nice horses you were telling me about last week.”

  I try for civility, but I can’t control the venom that seems to lace every word I speak. “Are you going to tell me how her fracture is healing? Or do I just have to guess? Maybe read your mind? Although, we all know I clearly never possessed that skill.”

  “Mad… I…”

  “Unless you are about to say something related to the medical care of my daughter, I suggest you save it for someone who gives a damn. I don’t want to hear it.”

  “Sally Rae’s fracture is healing well. There was no movement this week, so we don’t have to worry about resetting it. She needs to keep this cast on for five weeks, and then come back to get it removed. The nurse can do a straightforward removal.” Her tone is cold and detached, exactly what I need. Civility is too much to ask with our history. Tolerance for a doctor’s visit for Rae is the most I can manage. I’ll have Jax bring her back to get the cast taken off. I’m not setting foot in the same room as A.B. again, not on purpose.

  When Rae has her rainbow cast and we’re all set to leave, A.B. tells her to run on ahead to the receptionist and get a lollipop. I feel a burning sensation on my bicep – the sting of Annabeth’s touch, a physical pain. “Please, Maddox. Can we talk?”

  I glare at her hand, willing her to stop. “I’ve got a business to run, and a kid to get home.”

  “It doesn’t have to be now. Anytime that suits you. Please, if we’re going to live in the same town, you should at least let me explain.”

  My blood boils. The audacity. “At least? Are you fucking kidding me? First of all – take your damn hand off me. And, second of all - I don’t owe you shit, Annabeth. The time to explain yourself is long gone. I don’t want to hear it. In fact, I don’t even want to set eyes on you. You should have stayed away. This is my home now – not yours.”

  “I didn’t know.”

  Every word she says is like fuel to the flame. “Yeah, I’m well aware that you don’t know shit about me and my life. Let’s keep it that way, shall we?” I stride into the waiting room, scooping Rae up into my arms, and out the door.

  Sunlight warms my skin, my lungs dragging in a deep, calming breath. “You okay, Daddy? You need Docor A.B.?”

  The sweet smell of her hair restores my mood. “I’m fine, baby girl. Just enjoying the fresh air. You ready to go home and get to work? Those horses ain’t gonna take care of themselves, are they?”

  “No, sir! I’m checking for baby chicks today with Uncle Jax. He says maybe they will be hatcheded.”

  “Now that’s something to smile about.” I hold her in my arms until we get to the truck. She is my strength, and my weakness – an angel in all the chaos.

  Sweat drips from his brow, evidence of his overexertion. “Hey, Dad.”

  “You took your precious time. You forget we got work to do?”

  “I’m not in the mood for your shit today, Dad.”

  “Boy…”

  “You look like you’re about to pop a vein. Go inside and watch over Rae for a while. She needs a nap. I’ve got it from here.”

  I can see from his red, clammy skin, that he needs a break. He starts to make a fuss, but is obviously too tired to fight me. “I guess I can help you out if you need me to sit with Rae.”

  “Sure. I’m eternally grateful. I’m desperate to do ten hours of backbreaking manual labor.”

  “You got a smart mouth on you today. Gonna be like this every time you see A.B.?”

  “I’m not discussing this with you. That was a long time ago. I’ve moved on. Why can’t this town do the same?”

  He offers me no more than a grunt as he heads inside; his pace slower than normal. It’s strange when you feel that moment – the one where someone visibly ages before your eyes. I remember it with Pops. I must have been about twenty at the time. I came back to visit, and the second I laid eyes on him, I knew. It was as if he aged ten years right there in front of me. My dad, he has always been the strongest guy I know. Working a ranch, day in day out for almost forty years will do that to you. Today, he seems older. His movements sluggish. Maybe it’s just the heat getting to him, and I know he’ll take time out to hang with Rae whenever it’s on offer.

  Jax and I put in a good day’s work, and he stays true to his word, sitting for hours with Rae, waiting for a chick to hatch. By the time it finally happens, it’s way past her bedtime, and she just about passes out in his arms. When she’s down for the night, Jax is intent on getting me out of the house.

  “Let’s go to Cardinals and have a few beers.”

  “Really? Last time didn’t work out so well for me.” I balled out Annabeth in front of half the town. Not my finest hour.

  “You can’t hide here for the rest of your life. You gonna let her drive you out of your own bar? Fuck that, Mad.”

  “I’m just not up for it.”

  “I’m not taking no for an answer. Don’t be such a girl.”

  He knows I can’t refuse when he says that – it’s like a trigger. “Fine. One drink.” I’ve gotten into trouble so many times in my life, because I hate that phrase.

  The bar is quiet tonight, just the way I like it. I have control of the jukebox, and Kirby takes a break to hang with us for a beer… or five.

  “So, amigo. What the fuck happened with you and A.B. last month? You were out of here faster than Usain Bolt.”

  I drain my glass, and signal the barmaid for another round. “Don’t be acting like you ain’t already heard the entire conversation from half the town. I pitched a fit, and vowed never to set eyes on her again, until genius over here took Rae to her when she broke her arm.”

  “Where was I supposed to take her? You wanted me to drive twenty miles to the nearest doctor? She was crying, and in pain.”

  “Obviously not. I’m not a complete selfish asshole. I’d rip off my left nut to stop Rae hurting – which I think would have been more enjoyable than seeing Annabeth.”

  Kirby seems surprise
d. “Since when do you call her Annabeth? You been calling her A.B. since kindergarten.”

  “Since fourteen years ago, when the A.B. I knew, upped and left me. Can we not talk about her?”

  “Fuck. She really did a number on you.” He looks around the bar, as if some new face will magically appear. “We need to find you a woman. Sometimes a good ride is just what a man needs to clear the mind. Actually… it’s a cure-all.” He and Jax start listing available women, who could scratch my itch. Nothing sounds less appealing than Jax’s sloppy seconds. I do not want to put my dick where my best friend’s been. Maybe they have a point, though – it’s been a while since I let loose and had a hot girl riding me.

  “Friday night. We can get out of Kingsbury Falls – drinks, music, and women. You guys in?”

  In unison, they agree. Jax’s attention quickly shifts to the barmaid that’s gonna warm his bed tonight. She’s practically creaming for him right there on the bar. “If you’ll excuse me, gentlemen. I have some… business to attend to. I’ll see y’all later.” He disappears with a smug grin and a sly wink.

  “One for the road?” Kirby is already three sheets to the wind, but I’m happy to hang for a little longer. It’s last call by the time I leave, and I know I’m going to regret this in the morning.

  My eyelashes hurt. Just blinking feels like a huge task, but I force myself to look at the alarm clock. What the fuck? It’s 8.00 a.m. I don’t think I’ve slept this late since I was on the circuit. Rae? I throw the covers back and run to her room. She always wakes me in the morning. I stumble into her room, smacking off the door, and just as I slide on her rug, falling to the floor, I hear her sweet laugh echoing down the hall. The moment my head hits the ground, the true hangover penance kicks in. My brain feels like it’s swimming in my skull; ears ringing with a resounding, Gong! Gong! Gong!

  “Daddy!” Rae is on me like a spider monkey, shouting in my ear, crawling all over me. Her knee connects with my groin, a searing agony, blinding me. I reckon it’s worse than childbirth – if women felt this kind of pain, they’d only have one kid.