Mustang Daddy - A Single Daddy, Small Town Second Chance Romance Page 6

  “Oh my God!”

  She scrambles off me, her eyes welling with tears. “Sorry, Daddy.”

  I feel like the biggest asshole in the world, watching her lip quiver at the thought of hurting me. “It’s…” I think I’m gonna puke. “It’s okay, Sunshine. You didn’t… do anything… wrong.” I roll over into the fetal position, willing the pain to subside. Death would seem like sweet relief right now.

  Pops appears in the doorway. “What in the blue blazes is going on in here?”

  Rae grabs hold of his leg. “I hurted Daddy. I didn’t mean it.”

  He stares at me with a disapproving glare. “Hangover? I got no sympathy for that. You brought that on yourself.”

  “She kneed me in the junk.”

  “Well dang, son. That would bring a tear to a glass eye.”

  He herds Rae out of the room, leaving me to my misery. “Come on, Sunshine. Let’s go into town. Your dad needs some peace and quiet today.”

  When the house falls silent, I don’t even attempt to move. I clutch the edge of Rae’s comforter and pull it with pitiful energy until it’s half-covering me. I can’t manage any more than that. As I drift in an out of my hangover from hell, I think about what Pops said – you brought it on yourself. He’s right. I’m my own worst enemy. I need to put Annabeth behind me and get on with my life… when the room stops spinning.

  Chapter Six

  ANNABETH

  I haven’t slept properly in weeks. Being back in Kingsbury Falls is more difficult than I thought it would be. Short of becoming a hermit, I can’t avoid the prying eyes of this town on me 24/7. Since my run-in with Maddox outside of Cardinal’s, the whispers are incessant. I feel like half my patients only come in to glean the latest gossip. God, you could have heard a pin drop the last time he was in my office with Rae. By the time I picked up my to-go order at Ellen’s that day, everyone was talking about him storming out. I’m sure my face was the color of crawfish by the time I got out the door. If Lottie hadn’t talked me off the ledge, I would’ve been on the first plane out of here.

  The moment I got back, she welcomed me as if no time had passed. I don’t know what I would do without her. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a friend who wasn’t a doctor – who wasn’t competing with me, ultimately focused on furthering their career. Lottie is the opposite of that, in the best possible way. She has lived in Kingsbury Falls her whole life, and is happily married to Kirby, with two kids.

  Last night I turned up on their doorstep, a bottle of wine in hand, and a serious case of self-pity. Thankfully, Kirby was working. I don’t like putting him in an uncomfortable position… either of them. I know they’ve gotten close to Maddox since he moved back to town, Lottie has told me as much. Their daughter and Rae are friends, and I don’t want them, or Maddox, to feel like I’m getting in the way. Lottie has been so good to me, and she hasn’t pushed me for details. She must be the only person in this town who isn’t desperate to know why I’m back, why I left in the first place, what my plans are going forward.

  We drank wine, laughed about old times, and Lottie jumped right into dissecting every interaction I’ve had with Maddox since returning. She’s convinced we can find a way to be friends. Her assurance doesn’t do much to assuage my concerns. I’m not even sure if we can manage civility, but she did convince me of one thing – I need to talk to him, one-on-one. Before I lose my nerve, I’m going to head over to the ranch today and attempt to make peace. It’s a long shot, but the longer I stay, and keep accepting this kind of treatment, the less chance I’ll have of making him understand.

  I’ve been procrastinating all day – telling myself he’s probably busy. Rae’s mom might be there, and I don’t want to cause any friction. I haven’t probed Lottie for information about his life, or family, and I get the impression she’s relieved. He’s her friend, and she shouldn’t feel obliged to betray his trust in any way. I’m worried no one wants to tell me because this woman is or was his epic love. Or that she died tragically, and I’m just the asshole making his life harder. I hate that a small part of me wishes he were a widower. I’m a doctor for God’s sake – I’m supposed to want to save people, not wish them dead.

  I told Lottie last night, Maddox was my epic love, and I threw that away out of guilt, fear, and selfishness. My mantra is, as I toss and turn staring at my ceiling fan watching the hours’ tick by, this – You were only eighteen. You’ve saved so many lives because you left. Maddox made a life and a child. It was meant to happen that way. As much as I try to convince myself, it doesn’t stop my stomach from falling into my feet every time I think of him. Of how he looks at me now, and the memory of how he once did.

  It’s 8.00 p.m. by the time I pluck up the courage to jump in my truck and head for the ranch. Dusk descends on Kingsbury Falls, and any flicker of hope I had driving over here, disappears with the sun. It’s been fourteen years since I set eyes on the gates of Mustang Ranch. Whenever I came home to visit, I would avoid this side of town like the plague. I couldn’t bear the thought of reliving old memories. Most of my childhood days were spent on the ranch.

  My heart lurches into my throat, making it impossible for me to swallow – to breathe - as I pull into the driveway. I feel like I just travelled through time, back to the night before I left town. Maddox and I had gone skinny dipping in the lake; made love under the stars, and much to my shame – we made plans to meet for lunch the following day at Ellen’s. I knew when I left him that night, that he would be sitting there alone, wondering why I never showed. I’ve gone over that last night together so many times in my mind, and contemplated how he must have felt when he realized I was gone.

  From a childhood of experience, I know the moment the gravel crunches beneath the wheels, they know someone is here. My legs are numb, and I can’t bring myself to cut the engine and step out of the truck. I sit for what feels like an eternity, gripping the steering wheel so tight it hurts. Closing my eyes, I try to calm the riotous tornado of emotion constricting my lungs with every twist and turn.

  A fist raps against the window, scaring me half to death.

  “What the heck, Annabeth? Why are you loitering out here?” Mad’s dad is glaring through the glass, with the same frown he’s been wearing his whole life.

  “I’m so sorry, Mr. Hale. I didn’t mean to…”

  “I think you’re old enough to call me Bobby now, Dr. Clark. Now are you getting out the damn car or what?”

  “I…”

  “I ain’t gonna bite you, girl. You came here for a reason. Is it about Rae? Is her arm healing alright?”

  I slowly switch off the engine and open the door. At this point, I’m just being rude if I don’t get out. Guess the decision is made – I’m having this conversation tonight.

  “She’s fine, Mr.… Bobby. I came to talk to Maddox. Is he here?”

  “I don’t think that’s wise, Annabeth. He’s not in the right frame of mind to be dealing with you.” It breaks my heart to see the disappointment in his eyes. “You best go home, before you cause trouble.”

  “I understand. But, I really need to talk to him. We live in the same town now, and that isn’t going to change any time soon. Please… is he here?”

  My heart skips a beat, as I hear the familiar sigh of resignation. “You hurt that boy again and I won’t be responsible for my actions. Understood?”

  “Yes, sir. That’s the last thing I want. You have my word.”

  “I don’t like being rude to a lady, but your word isn’t worth a dime on this ranch anymore.” He reluctantly concedes. “He’s in the stables.”

  “Thank you.”

  With a slow nod, he leaves me standing in the evening air, unable to catch my breath. I know this is a mistake, but my feet have other ideas. My mind races with thoughts of what I’m going to say. I had it all worked out, until I got here. Now my grand speech is a garbled mess of random statements that make no sense. The closer I get to the stables, the quicker my brain spins. It’s imposs
ible to be stealthy on a ranch. The ground crunches and pops underfoot, a cacophony of sound, as I creep towards the light.

  Maddox is hard at work; I can hear him from outside. My first thought is how sexy his grunting murmurs of effort sound, as they echo through the stables. His voice carries a whole different tone now – low and raspy, causing my insides to flip flop more than a snapper on a hook. He was eighteen the last time I was able to enjoy the warmth of his drawl. Now, every word is laced with vitriol, his disdain evident in the staccato rhythm.

  “Fucking, fuck!” Maddox’s voice rings out in the encroaching darkness.

  I instinctively break out running toward the sound of someone in pain, to find him clutching his hand, streaks of red dripping onto the dry, yellow hay. “What happened? Let me look at that for you.”

  “Annabeth? What the hell? I told you to stay away from here. Go. I don’t need your help.”

  Years of training wins out over my desire to cower at his glare. The boy that once saw my very soul, now only sees pain and betrayal. “You do need my help, and you will accept it right now, because you’re bleeding, and you could get a nasty infection if you don’t let me clean it up. I’ll be right back.” I need to get my medical bag from the truck, but as I jog out the door, I catch him muttering to himself.

  “I won’t hold my breath. I’ll probably bleed to death waiting on you to return.”

  I keep moving; my resolve to find a way to live in this town with him, growing with every step. I know I broke his heart all those years ago, but he can’t hate me forever… I hope. I quickly grab my kit and sprint back to the stables, grinding to a halt at the sight of him. His white T-shirt now wrapped around his hand, soaking up the blood. His body is… staggeringly taut. Low-slung wranglers highlighting his iliac furrow. He had that sexy V when we were dating, but he was a kid back then. Now he is the picture of a rugged bronc rider – cut in all the right places, his skin tanned from working the ranch. His hair is darker, less blond than it was in his teens, and a perfect length to fist your hands in.

  I snap out of my shameless ogling at the sound of his voice. “Wow. All that training and a bloody hand has you frozen? Glad to know you left me for good reason.”

  “Just shut up and let me take a look.” I fight back the tears that threaten to fall. “I get that you’re pissed, but you were never cruel.”

  “That’s what happens when someone you trusted, stabs you in the back without explanation or apology.” I go to work on his hand, cleaning the blood to see what I’m dealing with. “Why are you here, Annabeth?”

  “Do you call me that just to hurt me?”

  “What the fuck? It’s your name!” I pour antiseptic over his wound. “Shit! Son of a b…”

  “You never call me Annabeth. You haven’t since we were five years old.”

  “I haven’t spoken to you in fourteen years. I’m not sure what the social etiquette is for that. I used to shout your name while fucking you, but I don’t do that anymore either.”

  Just the word on his lips has me pressing my legs together. “At least admit that you know it hurts me.”

  “Fine. I don’t want to call you A.B. I know it hurts you, but it hurts me more. For me… my A.B. died the day she left me behind. Part of me died along with her. Can you just accept that and stay away from me?”

  I finish wrapping his hand, the tension between us crushing my insides. The touch of his skin against my hand has me burning up. The silence is deafening, but I can’t find the right words. Sorry isn’t enough, and nothing else seems appropriate. As I secure the bandage around his warm, callused palm, my fingers drift to his forearm – my heart stops beating. His hand wraps around my wrist, restraining me.

  My eyes dart up to meet his – brimming with anger, lust… or both. There are so many unanswered questions, swimming in the depths of his intense blue gaze. My breath is shallow as I fight every cell in my body, until I can’t deny it any longer. I’ve imagined this moment so many times over the years. A slow sensual kiss; the rekindling of a love that was destined to come back to us. Instead, I lunge at him, taking his lips in a desperate plea for forgiveness.

  His scent envelops me as I savor the touch of his tongue – gentle, yet firm. I run my hands up his back; his naked flesh, deliciously hard and toned. My fingers curl into his messy hair, pulling him closer, but just as I relax into the kiss, he pushes me away.

  “What the fuck? You think you can just waltz back into town and pick up where we left off?”

  “No! I…”

  “Pulling on me like some fucking toy you get to control. I don’t think so. I’m not a naïve, love-struck teenager anymore.”

  “I wasn’t trying to control anything.” My cheeks flush with the volume of his voice.

  “Why are you here?”

  “I just wanted to talk to you. To explain.”

  “I told you I don’t want to see you, or speak to you. What don’t you understand?”

  My mouth engages before my brain. “The way you kissed me just then, says otherwise.”

  “You kissed me! I got over you, Annabeth. You forced that to happen, not me. You don’t get to come back after fourteen years and expect anything from me.”

  “I don’t!”

  “You don’t respect my wishes. I wasn’t subtle about it, was I?”

  “No, but…” He strides toward me, grasping my arms in his hands; his bandage turning red with the pressure of his hold.

  “Then why do you feel it’s your right to demand I listen to you now? You left without even a hint of an explanation, and I never heard from you again. Do you have any idea what that felt like?”

  My voice is barely a whisper, as I fight the tears that well in my eyes. “It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done… leaving you.”

  “I don’t want to hear it! Stop this. Stop trying to ease your own guilt. If you cared about me at all, you would leave me alone.”

  “I’m so sorry, Maddox. I didn’t come here to upset you.”

  His eyes search mine, wild and wanton. “What do you want from me? What? Tell me!”

  “I…” I can’t find the words. “I want…”

  “I don’t want you, Annabeth! I got over you. Goddammit!” He grabs my face in his palms, his lips descending on mine in a frenzied kiss. Our tongues twist and tangle in a punishing rhythm – transcendent in its primal simplicity. His hands roam my body, pulling me closer; the evidence of his arousal pressing against my thigh. The reality of this moment is so far beyond what I’ve imagined over the years. I never dreamt I would be the focus of his desire again. I didn’t think I’d ever be in the same room as him, when I made the decision to move back to Kingsbury Falls.

  I slide my hand between us, rubbing my hand over his washboard abs, his soft skin, a delight to the senses. His guttural groans only fuel the flames of my desire. His movements are hard and fast, pushing me against the stall. Reaching for the button of his jeans, I’m suddenly left bereft and gasping for air as he stumbles back, his bloodstained fingers brushing over his kiss-swollen lips.

  “I need you to leave.” His voice is low and menacing; his mood has changed on a dime.

  “I never meant to… I’m sorry, Maddox.”

  “Go! Now!”

  “We need to talk… especially after what just happened.” I can still taste him on my lips.

  “This was a clusterfuck of a mistake.”

  His words are a dagger to my heart. “Okay. I shouldn’t have kissed you. I got caught up in the moment. The last time I was this close to you…”

  “Was the night before you left me. Don’t you think I remember? That’s exactly why you need to go.”

  “Give me a chance. Please. Can’t we at least try to be friends?” That last word is a red rag to a bull.

  “Friends? Are you goddamn delusional, Annabeth? We will never be friends. A momentary lack of judgement doesn’t absolve you of fourteen years of silence. I’m a guy – you could have been anyone just now, and I would’ve r
eacted the same way.”

  My hand connects with his face before I know what I’m doing – slap! The sharp burst of sound reverberates throughout the stables. “You’re a cruel bastard, Maddox Hale.” A flash of guilt crosses his features, before his brow furrows in anger.

  “I’m cruel? Get the hell out of here, Dr. Clark. I have nothing left to say to you, and I certainly have no desire to listen to any of your empty apologies, or fake offers of friendship. You showed me your true colors fourteen years ago. I don’t owe you a damn thing.”

  “And you just showed me yours. You want to condemn me for the actions of the girl I once was. What about you? You’re a married man, and a father. You want to stand here and judge me?!”

  His face is mere inches from mine. “You don’t know the first thing about me.”

  “Tell me, then.”

  “You don’t deserve to know. Go listen to the town gossip mongers. We’re done here.” He strides out the door, disappearing into the darkness.

  I stagger over to one of the hay bales, my legs unable to sustain me. I told myself that I came here tonight to make some kind of move toward peace, but seeing the depth of Maddox animosity, I realize – it was selfish on my part. I wanted to assuage my own guilt, and instead I feel worse. I turned his life on its head all those years ago, and I could see it in his eyes tonight – I’m doing it again. If I wasn’t so concerned with what I want, and what I need, maybe I would have listened to him when he told me he doesn’t want anything to do with me.

  When I finally make it back to my truck, I stare into the rearview mirror, taking in the sight of the mess before me. There’s hay tangled in my hair, and Maddox’s blood smeared on my cheek. My lips look like they’ve been stung by yellow-jackets – a lingering reminder of my insanity. As I maneuver the truck through the gates and out onto the pitch-black, winding road back to town, tears begin to fall.

  I blew any chance I had of explaining the biggest mistake of my life. Clouded in despair, I can’t bring myself to regret our kiss. To feel his lips on mine, only served to confirm that memories are but a pale imitation of the real thing. What I do regret, and always will - is that Maddox Hale will never trust me again.